The Biggest Lie You Are Told About Getting Married

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December 4, 2018

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When you fall in love, the world feels new. It's as if everything is happening for the first time. That's why we love photographing weddings. Each wedding has us falling in love over and over again—it reminds us that there is wonder and mystery in this shared life we all build together. The most aspirational thing to us is rekindling that initial spark of falling in love. We want to give you that experience with your wedding photos, perfectly captured and forever remembered. It's here, in our journal, we celebrate your love story so all can enjoy it.

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What if we told you that you probably believe the biggest lie about getting married and you don’t even realize it.  Would you believe me?  Let us explain.

When you got engaged you undoubtedly experienced this.  You post on Facebook the camera photos that captured that incredibly joyful moment when your future husband popped the question or you popped the question yourself.

Confetti emojis and hearts exploded on your timeline. “CONGRATULATIONS!” everyone said.  But after the fanfare a few days later the newsfeed gets quiet and the wedding plans begin.  And it’s around that time it starts to happen.

The Biggest Lie About Getting Married

It Starts Well Intended

Your aunt remarks about how you should do the thing you have always wanted to do before the wedding day.  Your high school bestie says you should travel to the place you have always wanted to go before you are married.  All the guy friends tell the groom that he should run away while he still can.

Confusingly these are the same people who were congratulating you just a few days earlier but now they are telling you that you better do “X” before you get tied down because marriage changes a person.  Your divorced uncle says “Wait until year 3!” or “year 7” or “year X” because eventually after the honeymoon is over the whole relationship will change.

It’s a bitter tale that is supposed to be well intended.  These are clearly people who love and support you because they were genuinely excited about your engagement.  So why the change?

In part is because that’s what society tells us.  Society tells us that getting married is an amazing thing but being married is somehow limiting.  That once you are married your freedom is dampened and your marriage is a time bomb that is doomed to explode eventually.  But here is the truth.

Fountain Image

IT IS A LIE.

That’s right, it’s not true!  Despite what people say, being married is AMAZING.  Yes there will be ups and there will be downs, but that just comes with life and will come married or not.  But if you compared two lives, one married and one not, the married life hands down beats the unmarried life in so many ways.  You are spending your time, your house, your kids, your family with your best friend.  You will forever have someone looking out for you, watching your back, and sharing everything in your life.  What could be better?

Marriage is Awesome

After Leidy and I got married, so many people would ask, “So how’s the married life?”  Seriously at least 30 people asked me this exact question.  My response. “It’s the same amazing life we had before we were married only better because I can call her my wife and we are closer now than ever before.  Why?  What is supposed to be different?”

You know what their response to my question was? “I dunno.”  That’s right, every single person couldn’t tell me exactly what is supposed to be different.  That’s because they were asking me that question simply because life is somehow SUPPOSED to be different.  And we all think that because that is what we are told!

But the truth couldn’t be better.  The life-imploding-after-marriage myth is a lie.  Marriage is amazing.  You will find that you love your spouse more and more each day and your life is so much the better for it.

The Biggest Lie About Getting Married - Bride and Groom Image

Leidy and I Want to Dispell This Myth.

We want to show everyone that marriage is a blessing and easily the best thing that has happened to us.  We love meeting with a potential bride and groom when they are in the confetti emoji stage to share this with them and letting them know that your marriage will be amazing.  Love is not limiting it is liberating.  Your life will be richer and you will have more freedom than you had before you were married.  So ignore all those people seeding doubt in your decision to marry.  Embrace this exciting time of your life.  YOU ARE GETTING MARRIED!  Let’s celebrate!

For more wedding advice, be sure to check out The First Look: A Groom’s Perspective to learn how the first look doesn’t ruin the coming down the aisle moment and 4 Reasons to Hire Husband and Wife Wedding Photographers.

  1. Kerri Budd says:

    This is really beautiful blog post some much needed wedding advice! This is definitely something we should spend more time discussing openly. I have never truly understood the reason why people warn you to do anything before getting married. Marriage should be freeing and it should take you to higher places, not limit you.

    Leidy and Josh, thank you for sharing your knowledge and experience with us. This blog post has really made my day. It has been very insightful!

  2. This is a great post!! My husband and I experienced the same exact thing when we got married last year. We wish we had you guys photograph our wedding!

  3. Sarah Marie says:

    Leidy and Josh, you guys are wonderful people. Your heart for sharing love with the world and photographing weddings is exemplary. Hands down, you two are the best wedding photographers in Michigan. Keep writing posts like this!

  4. Bianca B. says:

    This is such a wonderful blog post! It’s refreshing to read about some real-life wedding advice. Keep writing wedding blog posts like this!

  5. Nolan Florance says:

    Hello mates, its great paragraph on the topic of marriage and fully explained, keep it up all the time.

  6. Kari Holmes says:

    LOVE THIS!

  7. Jason Knowles says:

    I love what you guys write about. Leidy and Josh, we are so excited to have you shoot our wedding. Our engagement pictures turned out amazing, thank you so much! Best photographers in Michigan!

  8. Chelsea Arens says:

    Hi Leidy & Josh! I love your blog! We are interested in possibly hiring you two to do our destination wedding in the Caribbean next year. Can we email you to talk about our wedding plans?

  9. Calvin Morris says:

    Very insightful topic. As a wedding photographer I would image you guys hear all sorts of stuff. But it’s nice to see a couple focused on marriage and the benefits it brings rather than the selfishness that results in divorce.

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